Food for thought – not for the street kids!
Written by Declan on June 9th, 2009 Categories: General, Kind-Hearted Tourists, Latest | there are 6 Comments »I’m not too sure if I’ll ever get the hang of this blogging craic, but sure I’ll certainly give it a shot. Quite often it seems that there’s simply not enough hours in the day to do all the stuff that needs to be done – not to mention then sitting down and writing about it all…. Well, that’s my excuse anyway and I’m sticking with it for the time being!!
Having already tried an entry on getting the finger out which, in effect, only delayed me actually getting the finger out, I now find myself faced with the inexplicably frightening task of finally having to kick-start this blog into some form of sustainable existence….
On that note, I’m about to make yet another start-of-sorts by sharing one of those inspirational-type stories that crop up ever now and then on the back page of the Kathmandu Post. If nothing more, it’s a ‘nice story’ which should hold its own meaning for each individual reader, but I also hope to add a word or two of wisdom at the end.
Having found a butterfly cocoon, a man brought it home with him. One day a small opening appeared, he sat and watched the butterfly for several hours as it struggled to force its body through that little hole. Then it seemed to stop making any progress. It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could and it could go no farther. So the man decided to help the butterfly, he took a pair of scissors and snipped off the remaining bit of the cocoon. The butterfly then emerged easily. But it had a swollen body and small, shrivelled wings.
The man continued to watch the butterfly because he expected that, any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body, which would contract in time. Neither happened! In fact, the butterfly spent the rest of its life crawling around with a swollen body and shrivelled wings. It never was able to fly. What the man in his kindness and haste did not understand was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening were nature’s way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon.
Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our life. If we went through our life without any obstacles, it would cripple us. We would not be as strong as what we could have been. And we could never fly. When you are under pressure, remember that you are a stronger person after you have gone through it.
I’ve no doubt that it wasn’t the unknown author’s intended core message but, when I first read it a week or so ago, my mind couldn’t help but turn to the countless kind-hearted foreigners who pass through Kathmandu and, usually with nothing but best intentions at heart, become unwittingly and inextricably entangled in the increasingly complex problem of begging – especially with regard to the children they encounter and often innocently befriend on the streets of Kathmandu.
My interpretation of the story here is not that these children need to struggle in order to become stronger, but rather the manner in which, without a properly informed understanding of any particular situation, well-intended intervention quite often leads to outcomes far beyond those which one might predict at first.
The ten-rupee note slipped into the hand of a child begging in Thamel, becomes so much more than the mere token offering of the confused, guilt-ridden or perhaps heart-broken tourist who desperately feels the need to do something…. To the relatively wealthy foreigner it may be ONLY ten rupees, but to the child (and often to the child’s parents as well) it’s ten good reasons to stay on the street begging and ten more reasons not to accept the help of organisations like just-one who are better placed to help the child in the long-term.
The bag of fresh fruit thoughtfully given by the Christian missionary girl from America… the packet of biscuits randomly bought by the French back-packing couple… the ‘hot food in a restaurant’ experience generously provided by the elderly Canadian lady… the day-trip to the zoo enthusiastically arranged by the Irish gap-year volunteer for his little street-kid buddies… the souvenir passport bag and cheap jewellery bought from the pint-sized hawker outside the hotel… the impromptu street-side counselling session lovingly hosted by the Australian medical student… the second-hand sandals selflessly donated by the departing Israeli trekker… the colourful handmade cards bought directly from the budding young, after-school artist… the heart-felt hugs and piggy-backs from the Dutch hippy girl… the teddy-bear key-rings and glittery pencils happily distributed by the German family… the chocolate doughnut or leftover pizza kindly shared by the Italian climber……
I could go on and on and on with the list of these real-life examples of the ways folk ‘help’ out here, but I’ll pre-empt the yawns and wandering eyes by drawing it to a close there and simply state that each of the above examples are not so drastically different from the ten-rupee offering mentioned earlier. I’m pretty sure that many individuals would offer all manner of justification for their kind-hearted actions, but am equally sure that more often than not the only positive outcome of any such actions is the sense of personal well-being experienced by the individual, rather than any long-term or sustainable benefit for the child.
I know, I know… It’s a pretty long-winded way of saying don’t go snipping butterfly cocoons while on holiday in Nepal, but it really is a VERY important message – one which I’m sure I’ll revisit again and again over time. As long as there are kind-hearted foriegners thoughlessly encouraging scores of young children to be and remain on the streets of Kathmandu, you can be sure that I’ll re-visit this particular soapbox many, many times! For anyone who wants to know what they can do to help, my main words of advice for now would be to simply enjoy your time in this amazingly beautifully country and recommend it to all your family and friends upon returning home – just don’t forget to also tell them that in most situations encountered in Nepal, giving is selfish!!
6 Responses to “Food for thought – not for the street kids!”
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What would you like to do now?
read the previous post Getting the finger out…, go on to the next post Monsoon Memories 2009, find out how to make a difference, or learn about our work.
June 9th, 2009 19:32
Fantastic article! I hope lots of people who come to Nepal will read it and take it on board. Keep up the writing
June 9th, 2009 19:36
Hi Declan,
They say quality rather than quantity… Well the quality of your writing is very high, so it can surely afford to suffer even a little bit in the pursuit of quantity. Good work. Now I am at the bottom of your page so have to make a decision about what to do so I will say goodbye. R
June 13th, 2009 05:02
What a strong metapher! I felt pretty helpless when I came to Kathmandu as a tourist from a rich western country. I wondered how can one help. I’m glad I met some people who made me aware about your work. Thank you for what you are doing!
September 11th, 2010 19:01
That’s very interesting about the “selfish giving”.
Thanks for blogging!
I always like reading about what you are doing.
September 11th, 2010 21:38
Surely it is street children, not street kidz?
September 12th, 2010 15:00
You’re absolutely right sir and I stand corrected! I try though to not get too bogged down in semantics and such (like the time-old debate regarding the definition of children of the street and children on the street…), as that generally does little more than just distract the mind from what really matters… ;o), d.